I've Gotta Tell Ya...

Ok, so I promised that I would offer you all a story for each day of December. I always think it best not to promise something you can't perform, but darn it if I didn't try. Did I even make it through 12 days? I don't think I did. Whatever. I'm sure whatever let-down you feel can be filled by the Christmas Spirit of the season. If not, go stuff yourself on fruitcake.
Yeah, I'm done with the stories. I think it was good while it lasted, and now I have other things to focus on: final exams, moving to a new apartment, grading work for the classes I'm a Teacher's Assistant for, ...going out to the cheap theater. See. I told you I was busy.
I have a rather different story to tell today:
I wanted some Subway. It's finals week and Subway sometimes just makes the world seem ...fresh? Anyhow, I usually never vary from my usual order: footlong spicy Italian on white -no cheese, not toasted. All veggies (yes, even the banana peppers and jalapenos) except onions and olives, with whatever sauce I'm in the mood for.
Today my order was no different. My sandwich sure was though ---now I never use my blog to gripe. No one likes a frowny face. I'm sharing this because I found humor in it, and thought it should be shared.
The girl who started my sub was great -nice even slice on the bread, perfectly-placed meat, ...then there was the other kid in charge of the veggies and sauce. He was pretty slow going, his attention drifted to the other two (gorgeous female) sandwich artists as he worked. Rather than placing the vegetables evenly, he sort of just plopped a handful on. He sprinkled a tiny bit of lettuce on (I hate a flat sandwich) so I asked him for a little more. A little more is what I got! Ha ha. He grabbed a pinched of lettuce and threw it onto the end of my sub. Whoa, turbo. Easy now.
I have come to the conclusion that Subway, in the screening of their applicants, asks them to define the word "extra". If they don't know it, they're hired. I want to take them to Payless. That place knows what's up. The Buy One Get One deal -now that is extra. Maybe I should ask for BOGO on the lettuce next time. Yes, exactly twice what you just put on there for no extra cost, please.
I had to just chuckle as he moved on, half of his attention on his work, and the other half divided evenly between two pretty faces. The tomatoes he didn't use got thrown into the lettuce bin --oops! And I could tell by the looks of the veggie bins this had been going on for a while.
So in the end, the only evenly-distributed parts of my sandwich were the meat, bread, ...and sauce. One bite was bell-peppery, one was super spicy. The next bite full of pickles, and the next a stack of spinach leaves. Quite the specialty.
And to think you can experience it all for just 5 bucks. Now that is a Christmas gift to my mouth.