Saturday, September 29, 2007



GREETINGS to ALL READERS!
I am now delving into the blog world for the first time, and hope not to disappoint.
Reading brings some of the greatest satisfaction to life, and those who disagree have obviously never really read.
Well said, well said if I do say so myself- and I suppose I do. I am the author to be sure.
There are many who throw together blogs like it's a peanut butter sandwich and, as scrumptious as those can be at times, they are nothing to send off to the publisher in their ooey-gooey-sticky mediocrity.
That said, I proceed in the hopes that none of my blogs ever rate among the P.B. and J.
But I must issue a warning. There will be times when my blogs will capture the essence of my mood at the moment. Read with caution! I never mean to be mean. You know what I mean? Now you're getting it.
With all the necessarily un-needed legal disclaimers out of the way, LET ME BLOG IT UP!!!

Welcome to my world.
I am 25, unmarried, and on the brink of something amazing...
That something is what the kids these days are calling "Education," "University," and the like.
I hold an AGEC degree (associate of general education curriculum) and have transferred to Flagstaff to continue the torturous process of filling my noggin with the knowledge our society demands.

SHIFT GEARS-
What is a BLOG? I hated the word when I first heard it (like so many other words I dislike at first, before I comprehend the meaning: "words like thither, mischance, felicity...").
I remember the day I visited the "OneLook.com" online dictionary to find out exactly what "BLOG" meant.
I knew it had something to do with the internet, but what exactly was it?
Was I just a societal misfit or unlearned oaf? Were there others like me who heard the word in conversation and just nodded as though they comprehended while, in reality, they are thinking, "Blog? How do you spell that? What the heck is it? Is it against my religious beliefs? What language is that?"
For the sake of all involved, I'm throwing out this explanation just for fun- irregardless (I threw that intentional grammatical error in just for kicks).

Blog: a shared on-line journal where people can post diary entries about their personal experiences and hobbies. Word origin? Blog is the shortened form of "web-log".

It's that simple. I couldn't believe it! English speakers whittle away at the syllables. "Internet" became "web," and "web-log" became "blog".

Why not shorten some others while we're at it?
Take "cookie dough" for instance:
We could shorten "cookie" to "cuh" and "dough" to "do".
"Cuh-do" ladies and gentlemen. (Oh, bless me!)
But then try to imagine ice-cream labels with that word.
"Super Creamy Cuh-Do chunk" No no no no.
That would never do. Cookie dough is FAR too sacred a word for English speakers to even think of shortening it. I should be punished. Thought-crime! Thought-crime!
So some words are to be shortened into babble which will eventually make a climb into mainstream speaking, and some babble-words are left behind as children grow out of infancy.
I want to teach my niece to say it now: "Blog, blog, blog, blog, blog. Ha ha ha. Blog Blog!"

And that concludes my first blog. It's sounding dumber all the time, and yet we won't stop saying it. I guarantee it.

There are more secrets to tell. Please come back and snoop around.
-Steven

1 comment:

Lady said...

Steve, my main man. If you posted this around campus, the ladies would come a-flockin'. Women love straight talk, that is, when it is doused in sugar and embellished to the max. Which, I may add, you have quite the gift for. Irreguardless of what you may think of yourself -or may not. Okay, I just wanted to say irreguardless.