Friday, October 29, 2010

The Night of Fright Approaches

Excitement is in the air. (Feel it Kronk,...)
Halloween falls on Sunday. So what? Let the rest of the weekend be declared a time of celebration galore!

I won't be in Rexburg for Halloween. I'm leaving tomorrow morning for the GSA (Geological Society of America) conference in Denver. I'm presenting my senior research, and that's a frightening enough event for me. Not really. I feel pretty confident in my preparation.

Can I share something with you? It's truly tragic. I got an email from our apartment manager earlier this week. I know that in the past, Rexburg Housing has been really fussy about the removal of our pumpkins from our porch prior to November 1st. In fact, if you didn't remove your pumpkin, they threatened to have a garbage removal service come by and that you would be charged $30 dollars for the removal fee. Hardly what I call a friendly request, but I wasn't too put out.
This time around, our manager informed us that we're to remove our pumpkins from our porch no later than Friday, October 29th.
Honestly. Really? Honestly?
I'm afraid so. This is no trick, nor is it a treat.

I admit that I do have a bias. I LOVE pumpkins! I really really do. It's almost scary how passionate I am about a dang piece of produce. But they are so big and bulky and unique and colorful and texturally diverse and seasonal! They come in the fall and they just make the season seem so much more festive. I've always felt this way, and the feeling grows stronger each passing year.

But this demand cut me deeper than my bias-level. This demand shouted "They've got no RIGHT!" This is America! It's the breeding ground of the modern-day celebration of Halloween! It's the setting for Washington Irving's classic tale of the Headless Horseman who lobs a flaming jack-o-lantern at the poor gangly Icabod!
Every American has, what do they call 'em ..."Inalienable rights". I think the right to display a jack-o-lantern on your porch in Halloween night falls in that category.
I'm all fired up. I have a notion to ditch my trip to Denver and spend the weekend dressed in my spooky costume, sitting on my porch, pumpkin in lap, protesting the whole removal scandal. What could they say?
"I'm sorry, but we have to take this."
"This is my personal property. It's my pumpkin. If you take it, I'll see you in court."
"I'm sorry sir, Rexburg Housing has a policy...."
"I too have a policy and it's called my pumpkin is my pumpkin and if you want it, you'll have to pry it from my cold lifeless fingers (which means so much more coming from someone dressed as a haunted-skeleton henchman ...cold ...lifeless)
I replied to the email and explained to my manager that, while I knew she wasn't the one who made the policy, I'd like the ones who did to know that tenants aren't pleased.
I submit that all of ya, every last ONE 'ya, has the right to keep and bear pumpkins!

1 comment:

Cat said...

Hey Steven! WOW! Our pumpkins are on the porch glowing as we speak...Your housing authority must have had a really bad experience with a jack-o-lantern as a child. "Keep Calm & Carry On" Steven.